Grumpy Blogs about life, dreams and Work

Travel Junkies - Go to Sydney?

When I was a kid, I read a book called the "WalkAbout", or something like that.  It followed the story of an Australian native who was out walking through the dessert, alone.  If I recall correctly, it was a boy and the walk about was part of the trial of becoming a man.  He had to go into the dessert by himself for months and survive. At the time I thought it would be a great adventure.  I still do. But, now I'm an Ogre and would most likely stay at a hotel and drive an ATV across the landscape, killing eco systems and trampling ancient trials, loving it like a McDonald's commercial and getting drunk to escape my self loathing. Sound like fun? Any one want to go? Yeah? No? If so, check out this sub-section of CheaperThanHotels.com designed specifically for Australian travel:

Syndey Hotels
Darling Harbour Hotel
Melbourne Hotel

Note: The site has a nice feature of showing pricing in multiple currencies. Though, the design is bit garish and cluttered.  It reminds me of junior high cafeteria cheese sandwich, French fries and to much ketchup.

Hey, does your little rug rat say things like "I ain't gonna?".

"Me and Tommy wanna play football"

"Schools sucks."

Well, maybe the little vermin just needs tutoring in English grammar.  If so, check out Tutor Vista.

Since, I have no kids, and Bud doesn't have the jaw structure, vocal cords or mental capacity to speak English...he is a dog after all...I won't be needing the services of Tutor Vista. 

Though, I could use an editor.

Anyone want to volunteer to edit Grunge Ogre?  Didn't think so.

Advertiser: Doritos

Synopsis: A man is driving, eating Doritos, staring at woman on the street who is also eating Doritos.  A voice over espouses the great qualities of Doritos nacho chips.  As the man crashes his car and his face slams into the bag of Doritos like an ari bag, the narrators just happens to be saying Crunchy.  The rest of the commercial follows suit with the woman running to his rescue and tripping.  The tag line was something like “Live the Life”

Rating:
Bee and OG : 8

OG note: We both laughed hard at the air bag bit, but the tag line seemed lame.  Funny commercial though.

Advertiser: Blockbuster

Synopsis: A couple of alley cats are tying to figure out how clicking a live mouse is going to get movies delivered to their house.  They click it it’s head, roll it back and forth and decide to plug it in.

Rating:
Bee and OG : 10 plus

OG note: Loved it.  Not just for the concept, but the animation as well. Though, I can’t remember if it was two alley cats or other wild animals that were clicking the mouse.  I was laughing too much.

Coke Weird world vending machine bon voyage

Synopsis: From the interior of a vending machine we see a giant coin drop in. We roll with the coin in a weird world animation, and see a coke bottle be released and conveyed through a surreal world of happy joyous characters not unlike images from Fini, Freddie or Dali, but happy, happy like Disney. They are launching the Coke bottle into the real world. Bon Voyage. The bottle drops out into the real world where a man takes I and pauses as he walks away.  Did he hear he joy inside the coke machine?

Rating:
Bee and OG: 6

OG Note: Fun animation and at did remind me of my favorite type of art.  Surrealism.

Advertiser: Etrade.com online stock trading platform

Synopsis: A bank manager and the staff put on animal masks and rob the customers. A narrator offers Etrade if you tired of being robbed by your bank.

Rating:
Bee and OG: 7

Note: Super fun. Commercial starts like a movie trailer.  Of course, all banks suck and weave in misc. fees where ever they can, but good commercial.

Advertiser: Flomax

Synopsis: Montage with voice over of elder men with bladder control problem living an active lifestyle of biking, etc.

Rating: 0

Note: Nothing original or exiting here, unless you can’t control your bladder.

An interesting, well as interesting as Flomax could be, might be to play with imagery of pipes in a house bursting and destroying a house, at first a CSI type zoom in of the plumbing cracking, leaking, as a man sleeps, trickling out the walls, building, building, building until it's a flood, the wall crashes, the man and his wife are swept away in a Tsunami of water and destruction. The man wakes. His wife sleeps beautifully next to him.  It was just a nightmare. He uses the bathroom and takes a Flomax. He heads out into his active lifestyle confident that his pipes won't burst. Nah. Pharmaceutical ads just suck.

Warning: In their disclaimer, the mention that Flomax may decrease semen along with a slew of other nightmare side effects. Enjoy.

Advertiser: Budweiser

Synopsis: A man and a woman debate if they should pick up a hitchhiker who has a case of Bud and an Axe.  The man, who is driving, says yes.  The woman says no.  She’s concerned about the Axe.  The man can only see the Bud.  They stop and ask what the Axe is for.  The hitchhiker says it’s a bottle open.  The man lets him get in the car.  They see another hitchhiker who is holding bud and chainsaw.  The man wants to stop.  The woman and the Axe Hitchhiker are concerned about he chainsaw.

Rating:
OG and Bee : 5