Grumpy Blogs about life, dreams and Work

I walked down the sidewalk with Bee and the crew.  We lived in Pasadena CA. I was obnoxious and drunk, happy, walking out ahead. Most likely I was teasing them by pretending to close the side view mirrors of parked cars.  I do that when I’m really drunk.  I find a mischievous joy in thinking about the car owner when they get in their car the next day.  They are running late, a bit groggy as they stay up to long the night before, turning on the car, checking the rear review and then the side. “Damn it!” They have to get out of the car and fix the mirror. The very thought makes me laugh especially when I’m drunk.  My friends, including Bee, all hate this about me. They think it’s juvenile and stupid. I’ve stopped doing it when they are around, but I will run up to a car and pretend to do it, just to see them get mad. Anyway, as I crossed the street heading toward home, a Porsche sped by missing me by inches.  My drunkenness quickly left as adrenalin rushed in.  The Porsche stopped at the end of the next block due to a red light.  I stood in the crosswalk and flipped them off. I hopped they saw.  I wanted them to come back. I wanted a confrontation. They made a sharp left when the light turned green, the another left at the next street.  I could hear their engine racing.  In less than 60 seconds they made another left on the street I was standing on.  They raced up to corner and pulled over into a skidding stop at the corner opposite me.  A family with a small child as sitting on the curb. The father pulled the baby between his legs as the Porsche came to the stop.  The people were laughing in side.  I don’t know if they were drunk, or not.  It was the end of the Rose Parade. The parents on the street curb were terrified. I went to the drivers side door, of the Porsche but the car was English and the driver was on the other side. They were middle aged B list actors. There was two men and two women.  Tracey Ullman was one of the women.  Is she B or A list? They laughed hysterically.

“What is your problem man? You almost hit those people and you almost hit me.”

“What do I care, it’s not my kid.”

“If you had a kid, you would care.”

“I do have a kid, and I don’t care.”

This was going nowhere fast. I wanted to hurt the man, but saw it useless. He was too drunk to appreciate the situation or a beating. Instead, as they laughed at my seeming impotence., I broke the driver side mirror by removing the mirror. I walked away as they continued to laugh.

At first they didn’t’ notice. I hoped they would drive off and continue not to notice until the police pulled them over for having a broken mirror. Unfortunately, Tracey Ullman noticed and told her husband. I heard them and wove the mirror above my head as I walked away.  I was hoping to slip it into a trash can before they noticed.  I heard the car door close behind me. I rounded the corner and sprinted, hoping to get lost in the thinning crowd.  It was all my neighbors though.  Black Bear and the rest were there. I walked around behind Black Bear and stuck the mirror in his hands as the man came around the corner.  Black Bear  took the hand off like a spy, unquestioningly, and hid it behind his back as I confronted the man.  He was smaller than I, and I could have fought him.  But didn’t really want to fight.

“What? It’s not my mirror.  What do I care if you get pulled over and arrested?”  The man tackled me, then tried took a friendly tone. “Look mate. You’re a good looking chap. No problem with the ladies I’m sure. Easy with the smile and pretty word here and there and off with the panties. Right? That’s all I’m trying to do mate, so let’s have the mirror.”

“Yes” I agreed with him, “But, that’s not the point.”

“What?” The man asked with disbelief.

I woke before I could say, “I don’t play women with looks and charm.”

The dream ended.